Happy 2nd Birthday Sweet Malakai

My baby, you’re 2 today. I’m trying to keep it together as best I can but my heart is beating a million miles a minute and it’s hard to catch my breath. I am so happy and sad, nostalgic and giddy.  I’ve been trying all week to write how much I love you but it’s impossible. I start and then the tears flow and everything I had written just doesn’t seem as significant as my love for you because there’s really no way to describe it. There are no words, my love. It’s too powerful. Too divine. And so, instead of writing just how much I love you I’ve decided to write the things I love about you.

I love:

Your piercing blue eyes, they’re like no other I’ve seen ❤

The colour of your hair and the way it smells after you’ve had a bath ❤

The smoothness of your skin and the little beauty mark on your back ❤

Your tiny hands that graze my arms while you try and fall asleep ❤

Your button nose ❤

Your teeth ❤

Your smile ❤

Your bum – you got it from your Momma 😉 ❤

Your laugh ❤

Your gentleness ❤

The way you love to share ❤

Your love for your beebee sissy ❤

Your love for the moon and rocks and birds and kitty cats and foo’s (dogs) ❤

The way you lay down on the ground outside and refuse to come in because you love outside so much ❤

Your squeal when Daddy chases you ❤

The way you try new things even though they are scary to you – my brave girl ❤

The way you repeat your words like ‘Tank youuuu, Mommy, Taaaaank youu’ and ‘Hiiii, Mommy, Hiii’ ‘Look, Mommy, look!’ ‘Moon, Mommy, Moon’ ❤

How you replace your P’s with K’s and say ‘Keeeys’ for “please” and ‘Kiggies’ for “piggies” ❤

Your love of music ❤

The way you sing ❤

Your voice ❤

The way you say “no” like it’s a question ❤

How much you love to cuddle ❤

The way you tuck your hand in the crease of our arms when you’re sitting next to Mommy and Daddy ❤

Your love of books and the library ❤

Your love for “sgetti” ❤

When you dance ❤

When you make silly faces with your sly smile ❤

The way you pat your hand on my back when you give me a hug ❤

Your sense of wonder ❤

When you hold sissy’s hand – you’re always protecting her ❤

The way you talk and giggle in your sleep ❤

The way you take an exaggerated breath when you find something neat ❤

Your kindness ❤

Your spirit ❤

Your heart ❤

I love everything about you, baby girl.

You are destined to do great things, little love – I know it.

I am so grateful God gave us the gift of loving you.

Happy 2nd Birthday My Sweet Malakai ❤

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10 Things That Happened This Weekend

So much has been going on lately. A list is the easiest way for me to organize so here it is, 10 things that happened this weekend:

  1. This weekend Nick’s uncle was laid to rest. The church was absolutely beautiful and the girls and I got to meet so many family members we’ve never met before. It was an emotional weekend but it was filled with so much love.  We will miss you Uncle Glen ❤ ❤ ❤
  2. We had a lovely evening spent with Nick’s cousins, filled with wine (the best I’ve ever tasted thus far!!), and deep conversation. It’s such a blessing to be able to keep close relationships with extended family members.  Malakai had so much fun playing with her little cousin.  Truly an incredible thing watching the next generation play and love each other ❤
  3. We stopped at my Mom and StepDad’s house and had some moose stew! It was delish. I haven’t seen my StepDad in forever and this was Ellanor’s first time meeting Papa so it was kind of awesome 🙂 My Mom has come up to stay with us for 2 weeks! She’s only been here 1 day and has done all our laundry, folded and put away and everything!! What a gem she is I tell ya. So happy she’s here with us ❤
  4. Malakai said the F*&# word… so we are being more careful with our language! LOL
  5. Ellanor has been the funniest, happiest little human lately.  She laughs at literally everything. So many people were holding her this weekend, I don’t think I’ve said, “Where’s my baby?” so much in my life. You bring so much joy my little Bee ❤
  6. We spent time with Nick’s Dad. It was the first time seeing him in 9 months or so and it was the first time Ellanor met her Grandad ❤
  7. Nick’s Aunt and Uncle spoiled us with dinner at Earl’s and two huuge gift bags of toys and clothes for the girls. (Thank you!) We love spending time with them! ❤
  8. Ellanor had her first road trip and she did SO good! She only cried her head off for one out of five hours! And, we only had to stop twice! That’s pretty great I think!
  9. We took Malakai to this indoor play park called Treehouse and it was so much fun! She was cruisin around everywhere and even crawled up to the top of the treehouse and slid down the slide!! That is a super brave act for her!
  10. Yesterday, we celebrated all our March babies, there’s 5 including Malakai! All of my family went down to the Friendship Centre and we ate, had cake, watched the birthday peeps open their presents, and played bingo, all while the kids ran around wild and free.  That’s what I love most about our family gatherings, the kids just run wild, everyone helps out in keeping an eye on them so I feel at ease knowing my babies are being looked after by their aunts and uncles and cousins. I really attribute our family’s closeness to my sense of belonging in life.  Without all our family gatherings (sometimes its literally every weekend depending on the month), I seriously don’t know who I’d be today.  I love my family so much ❤

It was a whirlwind of a weekend to say the least. We started of mourning a death and ended it celebrating life.  There was so much love, so many hugs, and “I love you’s”, my heart is full of gratitude.  I was blessed with a crazy, loving family, and have been accepted with open arms into another loving family ❤ I have no words except THANK YOU. Thank you, thank you, thank you a million times over. 🙏🏼

Uncle Glen ❤

 
They held hands the entire trip 💕

 

Malakai made this picture for Uncle Jimmy ^

 

Photo cred: Grandad, Aunty Lainzy, Nitner, Moi 

To My Husband

Remember that time we were at the Snye and you swooped me into your arms, carried me into the water and threw me in?  Or, what about that time in Mexico when we took those shots with fire then hit the empty dance floor and danced and laughed the night away just me and you? Or how we used to park in the Thickwood Arena parking lot, in my little purple rusted car, with the seats all the way back so we were lying down and no one could see us and we would just talk about life and the future and laugh and argue and cry and make up again. We’d stay there almost all night! Or, how I would wear your Trapper’s football coat to all your home games even though I was drowning in it, and you would point out into the crowd after a touchdown and I would hold my hands over my chest to keep my heart from jumping out. Or, the night before our wedding, how we were supposed to party separately and sleep in different rooms, but we ended up drinking a little too much with all our friends and family and then stayed in our honeymoon suite a night early 😉 Do you remember?

Do you remember how much fun we used to have together?  How crazy and carefree we were? Please tell me you do.

Even though those days are long gone and we are in over our heads with diapers, debt and bills, I want you to know that somewhere under my puke stained pyjama’s is that crazy, carefree girl you fell in love with 10 years ago.  Even though her body and mind has changed, and she stresses about the littlest things and randomly cries and takes things too seriously and rolls her eyes at the thought of cleaning and making dinner, I promise you she’s still there somewhere, that fun-loving person you used to know.

Sometimes I lay awake at night thinking about the past, how things used to be when it was just you and me, and I really really miss it. But, then I look over at you fast asleep, Malakai’s hand on your chest and your hand over hers and my heart swells.  How did I get so lucky?

So much has happened and our love has grown and changed as much as we both have but I want you to know that I will always remember, I will never forget. I am still so in love with that cute boy I met by the fire that one night 10 years ago ❤

xo

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Swimming in a New Pool

You know when you plan for something like to run a marathon but you’ve only just started walking recently and at first you feel jolted with enthusiasm and your motivation is just through the roof, but then you realize you’ve been walking now for a month and find it hard to even think about running at all, you’re so far away from where you want to be, and all of a sudden, that enthusiasm and motivation are replaced with doubt and gloominess.

That’s where I am right now.

I just feel so stuck. I want my life to be a certain way and it just isn’t. Then, I feel guilty for not being grateful for what I have.  It’s a vicious cycle.  Being a mom changed my life completely.  I used to wake up early, meditate, stretch, drink my hot coffee sip by sip, just taking it all in. It was a beautiful routine.  Now, I sleep in every chance I can get because I am always tired. I wake up with the girls and flail around like a crazy person changing diapers, making coffee and breakfast, playing, breastfeeding et cetera. I used to do 2 hours of yoga everyday!  Now, I can hardly have a 10min shower without a knock on the door.  I used to have abs…okay, now I’m gunna cry LOL.  Of course, I wouldn’t trade it for the world, I’m just learning to swim in a new pool now and sometimes I feel like I’m drowning.  Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming.  Haha, Finding Dory is on right now so I can write…

Anyway, I just need to accept where I am right now mentally, physically, and emotionally and just go with that. I am super blessed, even if I can’t do a sit up just yet, hah! I will get there again! I am determined. I will start meditating again, just this time it will be holding my 5month old so she doesn’t cry while my 2 year old is poking me in the face.  I will downward dog with a toddler on my back and kiss my baby on the forehead on my way into child’s pose. My daughters will not be my excuse, they will be my motivation.

I can still do the things I love it’s just going to be different, and that’s okay.  More than okay, actually… it’s kinda perfect ❤

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Vacation Life

I’ve been stuck inside lately, Malakai has had a runny nose and cough so we’ve taken a few days off from going out ‘n about. Plus, it’s so cold out! So, needless to say, I’ve been going a little stir crazy and the girls have been driving me nuts! Haha, which led to me dreaming of being somewhere else, on vacation, Hawaii preferably!

My Instagram feed has been flooded with vacation pics lately, many of them using hashtags like #vacationlife or my favourite, #myvacationneedstobemylife. Unfortunately, for us, it’s not in the funds (yet!) to go on a luxurious vacation such as Hawaii but, I thought: what if we started living like we were on vacation anyway?!

What makes being on vacation so great? Obviously, being somewhere new and exciting and beautiful but it’s more than that! When you’re on vacation every day is a new adventure, you make the most of your time, you enjoy your partners/family’s/friend’s company and engage in real, meaningful conversations, you play with your kids and make love with your husband, you are rarely on your phone checking what other people are doing because you’re too busy enjoying what YOU are doing, you are relaxed, and living in the moment.  Imagine if we could live like this all the time, no matter where we are?  

We are not just here to work and die.  It’s so easy getting caught up in the hustle & bustle, glorifying busy, and forgetting the important things in life, the things that make life sweet and beautiful and happy. I don’t want to be stuck on auto-pilot. I want to LIVE.

So, I’m looking for inspiration through my daughters’ eyes.  I’m going to switch up my mundane routine and start the day with excitement and wonder! Brush my teeth with my left hand instead of my right, dance while doing the dishes, look at people when they talk to me and really listen to what they’re saying, blast music early in the morning or late at night or whenever the hell I want… You only have this one life to live, so why not live it the way you want. Why not live like you are on vacation every day?  Life is after all, what you choose it to be.

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Okay, so after looking through these old vacay pics, I DEFINITELY need a vacation. SO scratch everything I just said haha jk!

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Started my Hawaii fund jar !!!

 

My Oscar Epiphany

Hi Everyone!

On Friday, I made Bee and Kai public and received so much love I was blown away!!  I was so incredibly nervous I felt like puking the entire night before but I went with it and am so happy I did. 🙂 Thank you for all the support I am truly grateful for each and everyone of you who took the time to read, comment, share etc.

I’m sitting here, watching the Oscars, trying to write during commercial breaks but it’s so hard, I can’t take my eyes off the screen! It’s just too good! Even the commercials! LOL
Viola Davis’ speech??? Oh my gaaawsh, I was bawling. So happy she won. I love the Oscars!

While I was pregnant with Malakai, I would envision myself as a parent and one of my “rules” was absolutely no TV before age 5. **Let me just take a minute to laugh unbelievably hard at myself right now** Well, that did not happen, actually nothing really turned out the way I envisioned it, but I’ll save that for another post.  Anyway, turns out she LOVES movies which helped me out big time when Ellanor was born via C-section and we pretty much camped out in the living room the entire 6 weeks.  But, I’ve always felt so guilty letting her watch her shows. Like so guilty. We would have a movie day one day, and the next I would turn off the TV for the rest of the week (except for nap and bedtime when I snuck it in).  It’s always eaten at me for some reason, and if I’m being totally honest, she really doesn’t even watch that much TV.

Watching the Oscars tonight, I had an epiphany.  It made me reflect back on my childhood, all the movies I’ve watched, my passion for stories, my love of writing.  As a kid, I watched SO many movies.  I loved it.  I remember for a project in Grade 5, we were supposed to make a poster board of facts about something or someone we loved/looked up to, and most of the kids did their projects about their Mom or Dad or a family pet or favourite animal and I did mine on Jim Carry, haha!

It was a much needed escape for me.  For an hour or two I would get completely lost in another world and it filled my soul with hope, laughter, empathy, but more importantly, possibility.  This sounds so cheesy but I realized it was movies that taught me to dream big, and showed me there was a whole world to explore out there and that you could create the life you want to live.  They would inspire me so much I would spend hours learning dance moves, or draw out entire city’s where I imagined “my movies” would be. I would write stories with a similar story line to a movie I just watched.. I was so inspired by them I even went into modelling school and auditioned for 2 commercials!! Haha, so embarrassing. I had no idea what I was doing.. but, the point is that I was inspired enough to TRY and that’s what I want for my daughters.

I want them to fall in love with something. Be passionate about something, be it sports, music, art.  And, movies are after all, an incredible form of art. So, who am I to deprive her of something she loves! What if she were to become a film maker, producer, director, writer, actress, visual effects technician, musician, the list goes on! Would I feel guilty then? Hell no. The only thing I’d feel guilty about is how many drinks I had during the Oscar’s after party.  😉

So, Malakai, I want you to dream big and promise Mommy all this movie watching will pay off somehow, even if it’s just the special memories made while cuddling on the couch together.  Can’t wait to watch Moana with you tomorrow

The Best Year of My Life

I know it’s almost March and I’m a little bit late with the whole New Years Resolution thing, but let’s be real here, who actually starts their resolutions January 1st am I right?? Or maybe it is just me, hah! Either way, I’m going to tell you about my plans for having The Best Year of My Life!

I stumbled upon this incredible book at the library the other day, while I was working on one of my many resolutions, to read more! The book is called, The Best Year of Your Life by Debbie Ford, and it is aaamazziing.  Her voice is super motivating and she gives you action plans and tips I find would be useful! I was actually looking for another book when I found this one and I’m soo thankful I trusted my gut and got it instead!

Every year, I am always making 101 resolutions for myself.  I’m addicted to self-improvement and I get SO excited for the whole “new year, new me”, but I’m often taking on more than I can chew which then leads to unproductiveness and disappointment.  This brilliant lady suggests in order to have the best year of your life to only focus on TWO goals you want to achieve, write them down, make a plan, set a date in which goals have to be achieved, and have a support person and/or group to keep you accountable. She claims that setting yourself up to achieve two realistic goals will boost your self esteem and make you eager to create two more goals and so on.

She talks about many other things that will aid you in having the best year of your life. Here are my two favourites:

  1. Claiming the moment. Being more present. Taking mental polaroids of at least two special moments everyday. *Nick and I and the girls started talking about two of our favourite moments from the day every night before bed.  I hope we can make this a special little family tradition, I just love it! It ends the day on a happy note and everyone goes to bed with a grateful heart ❤
  2. Creating unforgettable days. Setting up a special day for yourself and/or the ones you love once a month. *We’re going to have family movie nights the first night Nick is off work. We’ll put the phones away, make some popcorn and cuddle up for a movie with the girls 🙂  We’re also planning on having Mommy/Daddy or should I say, Husband & Wife nights, where it’s just Nick and I, PHONES OFF or put away, and we can either stay in and play board games or binge on Netflix or go out! And, of course I need a special day just for moi! I’m thinking a nice hot bubble bath with candles and a big glass of Cabernet Sauvignon 🙂

Having your best year yet is all about taking your life in your own hands and the advice this author gives is super motivating, I love it and I’m so excited for this year! The best year of my life 😉

*I highly recommend reading her book, but if you aren’t so much into reading she has a website you can go to for tips and worksheets and stuff! www.bestyearofyourlife.com

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I’d love to hear from you guys what kind of things motivate you? I’m always up for new reads too! Thanks and good luck to us all! 🙂

Xo,

Alyssa

Finding Balance with Social Media

I’ve always had this weird relationship with social media. It’s a love/hate one. I love connecting with family and friends, especially the ones that live far away and I don’t get to see very often. I love to look at pictures and get the low-down on what’s going on with everyone lately.  I love all the Mommy’s I follow and women I look to for inspiration in food, fashion, parenting, and fitness. I love reading inspiring quotes and motivational messages. But, it ain’t always rainbows and butterflies in the social media realm. There’s a darkness that looms and it can be very very depressing if you let it get to you too much.

The other day I was having a social media overload day. I scrolled aimlessly through Facebook, Instagram, SnapChat, and took Pinterest breaks in between.  My mood changed as I looked through countless photos, everyone dressed to perfection, hair did, make up did, goal weight achieved, checking off their bucket lists, having so much fun.  And, as if it were written in bold, red letters on the screen of my phone that ugly feeling came back to me: you are not enough.

I was mentally taking notes with every post I looked at:

omg I love her lipstick I really should start doing my make up more…  wow, she looks so put together and she has 2 kids -there’s no excuse for me to look like I’ve just fallen outta bed everyday… ugh, I wish I could travel that much…  she’s such a good mom doing all those arts & crafts I gotta start doing more arts & crafts with the girls… she has abs after giving birth!? WTF am I doing wrong here???    

Not enough, not enough, not enough.

And, the worst part is I let it consume me.  I felt my mood change, I knew I should just get off but I couldn’t. I was stuck to the screen and sucked into everyone’s perfect lives pondering how I can change mine.  All the while the most beautiful little girl that helped create danced and played in front of me and I was missing it all.  So now my feelings of not enough are mixed with anger and guilt and THAT is what I hate about social media.

I’ve come a long way, though, in finding a balance.  In 2016 my New Years Resolution was to go off Facebook for an entire year and I did it! It felt soo good. And, after discovering Brene Brown (LOVE HER!)  I realized I use social media as a source for numbing feelings I don’t wanna feel, like a drug I suppose.  Usually, social media is a positive thing for me and there’s  a lot that I love about it, so when I have those days of continuous scrolling and those “gremlins”, as Brene calls them, creep up, telling me I’m not good enough, I have to ask myself : what am I trying not to feel right now? Then, I write and write and write until I discover what it is I’m trying to numb and to my surprise it is usually quite a bit.

Once I reveal all these emotions to myself, I unfortunately need to deal with them and I’ve found that writing, talking, meditating, and time in nature works best for me! So, that’s what I did after that day of vicious scrolling and it reallllly realllly helped.

Sometimes we just gotta put the phones away and get back to ourselves, to what really matters and just say thank you, thank you, thank you, repeatedly until our hearts fill with gratitude because who we are, what we have, IS good enough ❤

 

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Do any of you struggle with social media this way? What are some of the things you do to help you feel better and find balance?

Xo,

Alyssa

15 things

I used to make lists of all the things I was happy about/thankful for and I haven’t done that in such a long time. It really helped me focus on the good things in my life and when I would have a bad day, I could just read over my list and know there were at least 15 things I was happy and thankful for 🙂

So, I wanna start doing that again!

Here’s my 15 things :

1. My little Bee’s laugh.  She does full belly laughs now and she thinks almost anything is funny.  The other day I peeked in the living room after hearing Ellanor’s adorable little laugh and saw Malakai standing in front of her, moving her head side to side 🙂 the sweetest! ❤

2. Malakai calls herself “baby Kai” right now – cutest thing ever! She also calls anyone that doesn’t look like an adult, a baby, hah.  She’ll point at a 10 year old and say “Baby! Baby!” Haha, my little nerd 🙂

3. Nick’s working schedule is perfect right now. Loving the whole 7 days we get to spend together! Thankful for his job!!

4. I started exercising a little over a month ago now and am already seeing results! Plus, I’m loving the adult conversations with my workout partner/friend 🙂

5. Malakai singing.

6. Conversations with Ellanor

7.  Sunday meals with my family

8.Nice weather!! It’s been in the pluses all week and it’s February! A rare and beautiful thing in Northern Alberta!

9. Running! Last night, I ran for the first time in nearly two years!! AND it was outside AND it was with my doggies AND they were well behaved!

10. Co-sleeping with our little lovelies 🙂  We have always co-slept but for some reason I’ve always felt self conscious about it.  So many people think it’s weird! I’ve been asked millions of times, “are they in their own bed yet??” And, I’m like “nooooo…should they be?” Then, I would feel like we’re doing something wrong and say to Nick, “they NEED to sleep in their own beds! like now!” And he would be like, “naaaaaah. screw what people think!” So, for once, I am taking my husbands advice and screwing what people think! 😉 But seriously… I really love co-sleeping 🙂 ❤

11. Moana. Pretty much the best Disney movie since Beauty and the Beast and Lion King.  It’s on repeat in our house and Nick and I have even watched it without the kids!

12.  Ellanor’s farts 🙂 She wakes us up with her little farts ❤

13. When Kai talks to Bee

14. Malakai’s love for the moon.  When it gets dark she runs to the window and yells (literally) “Mom, mom, mom, mom – mooooooon!” 🙂 And she makes us all say Hi and Buh bye ❤

15. Lately, when Nick gets home from work, it’s hug time then chase-each-other-around-the-house-time.  Malakai actually gets so pumped for it sometimes she forgets all bout the hug and just starts running around screaming haha ❤

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This was taken on my run!

Valentine’s Day

I LOVE Valentine’s Day!

As a little girl, I would wake up to heart-shaped pancakes with heart-shaped strawberries and whipped cream, the kitchen decorated pink, white and red with heart balloons, and gifts of chocolate and I-Love-You cards set out on the table for us kids! We’d exchange hugs, and get ready for the day. I would wear my prettiest outfit and do something special with my hair, then collect all the cards I made the night before along with my hershey kisses I got that morning and jet off to school.  There, I would give everyone I seen, even if they weren’t in my class, a hershey kiss, and wish them a Happy Valentine’s Day with such enthusiasm they were probably a little creeped out, hah! I’m not sure if it was taking the time to look my best that day or all the extra love received, but no matter what I always felt sooo beautiful on Valentine’s Day, it was like the love in my heart would overflow and in my head I would swing open the window and let all my love pour out in song just like a Disney princess 🙂 haha! But for real!!!!

Now as a wife and mom, I want to pass that tradition down to my lil family, make my girls and hubby feel special and have our day smothered with love! but holy moly, I didn’t realize just how much work it takes!! *Shout out to all the Mom’s/Step Mom’s making this happen every year! I have so much more gratitude for my Moms now that it’s my turn ❤

I had this big plan mapped out in my mind of how the day would go.  I would wake up extra early, get all prettied up, run to the grocery store, grab the decorations and the ingredients we needed to make our heart-shaped pizza’s for supper, run back to the house, decorate and have breakfast ready for Nick and the girls when they woke up. We would exchange hugs and kisses and eat and then take the doggies for a nice long walk, and get our sweat on so we don’t feel guilty about the copious amounts of pizza we were going to devour later. After our nice long walk, we would start on our pizza, having so much fun watching Malakai roll out the dough and place her toppings on. Then, after eating, we would put the girls to bed and have a glass of wine, play some cards and have a little Adult time! Well, let’s just say it did not turn out the way I imagined, but was still pretty amazing.

Here’s what actually went down:

I woke up with the girls… made toast with peanut butter and heart-shaped strawberries and Malakai ate everything but the heart-shaped strawberries. We all got ready together (which took half the morning) and went to the grocery store to get the decorations and ingredients that I was supposed to get before the girls woke up. For some odd reason Malakai didn’t want any of the decorations in our cart and was throwing a fit about the balloons being in there (and she loves balloons!!) so we ended up coming home with no decorations at all except some lilies that I wasn’t budging on. Then, Malakai goes for her nap and Nick and I clean. When she wakes up we all get ready to go for our walk with the dogs but just as we were all finished getting dressed I realized Ellanor hasn’t eaten yet and so I tell Nick just to take Malakai out so she doesn’t get hot while I feed Ellanor… I’m done feeding Ellanor, got my tula on and my back pack on ready for our long walk with the dogs. I get out the front door and Nick and Malakai are no where to be found. I look over to the park that’s in the field in front of our house and spot them. I guess we are not taking the dogs on a long walk… Instead, we played at the park. When we got back inside I gathered all the ingredients to make the pizza’s and set it out on our dinning room table.  But Malakai was so not into it… I think she was mad ’cause she wanted to play longer outside so she was being a lil stinker and pretending not to hear us calling her to the table.  After picking her up and forcing her to sit at the table (’cause we were gunna have fun damn it!) she poked at the dough a couple of times and decided enough was enough so we ended up just putting on Barney while Nick and I made the pizza’s.  Then, we ate together and started getting the girls ready for bed.  But, of course, they just weren’t havin’ it.  After the 15th million time Malakai came outta the room, we just let her stay up and I had to laugh. I had to laugh because if I didn’t I think I woulda cried.

So, I poured myself a glass of wine and gave Nick his beer and we turned on some music and just sat.  Malakai sang and danced and then got out the paint and Nick sat with her and painted.  With Ellanor asleep on my chest, her little breath tickling my skin, I watched my husband and my oldest sing and paint and it hit me, that feeling I used to get as a little girl, my heart overflowing with so much love!! Nick and I have been together for 10 years. That’s 10 Valentine’s days! And, watching him be so playful, so gentle, so loving with our girls, I think this Valentines had to be the one with the least romance but the most love. ❤

I had been trying to make this day so perfect and was blinded by what I “thought” it should be, that I couldn’t see it for what it is – so completely magical and beautiful.  And just like that, there I was, a Disney princess singing my love song to the world!  *Hehe, I really need to do this one day. I just think it would be so fun! 🙂

So all in all, it was a pretty great day. I’m so thankful for my lil’ family

 

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Hope you all had a wonderful Valentines Day filled with love!

Xo,
Alyssa